Bah Halloweenbug

Well, I've started a new job. This was just week one, finished. It was intense. Lots to remember, faces to remember, names to remember, a cheery disposition to keep up even though all I wanted to do was scream or run to the bathroom and have a good cry. Ok, it's not that bad. Just another change in life and a transition to get used to.

So in addition to the whole job thing, I got thinking a lot about image and how it's so important to project "professional" once you enter the working world. All this translates to employability. I thought that it would be more lax in the dot com world, but at the end of the day, it's still a business and business casual reigns supreme.

It's not an easy transition for me since I'm pretty low-key and into comfort. I may also be stuck in a halfway point where I still enjoy youthful clothes, but I can't necessarily pull them off in my day-to-day work world. There's this girlness that I can't seem to shake, and maybe it's more about a mentality that needs to be shaken.

I used to have a shoe mantra that if I couldn't run in them, then I couldn't wear them, which is why I rarely own heels. I have never even tried on a pair of stilettos, yet they are the shoe that comes to mind when you mention the word "style". I don't think it's possible to be considered a style icon if you're someone who wears flats. It's kinda sad really, how there's only one kind of "style" but that's the way the cookie crumbles.

In all my years, I've owned four pairs of heels. One of which I bought this year. I think I'm going through an image anxiety transition. Clearly the jeans and t-shirts aren't going to cut it anymore yet I'm at a loss as to what is "professional" and still a personal style. As hokey as this is going to sound, What Not to Wear is exactly the kind of show that would be beneficial to someone like me. Ugh. I can't believe I just said that. Shoot me now.

Oh yeah, and I hate Halloween. I usually get costume performance anxiety. There's way too much pressure to come up with a costume, and I never do. I almost considered wearing a #11.